One if by land, two if by sea

Signals are so important in life. They are everywhere: traffic lights, street signs, that look your toddler gets when he’s just about to poop, alarm clocks, thunder claps. For the most part, signals are underappreciated, but truthfully, we’d all be in big trouble if it weren’t for the proverbial writing on the wall. I, for one, can be a bit clueless when going about my business day in and day out.

Life can be overwhelming too, so I need that jolt back to reality. It has taken me a while, but I am actually starting to look around for signals, instead of letting them smack me upside the head! Nowadays I would much rather have a little heads up when something is about to happen, no matter how short notice, than to be blindsided- although this might be a sign of “older,” and not necessarily “wiser.”

No tresspassing

My husband Curtis and I have very flexible schedules during the day, therefore we often work late at night. Nighttime is often reserved for projects that need extra concentration, or dedicated to knocking out emails en masse. In our busy schedules we have to fit in time for everything, and intimacy definitely cannot take a back seat.

I used to be a night owl, but I think another sign of my impending old age is the need to go to bed earlier. We have five children, and by the time everyone is tucked in bed, I am just wiped out! Frankly, if I am up past midnight, the next morning is going to be rough, and I definitely need my beauty sleep.

Curtis is exactly the opposite. He’s one of those people that can stay up ’til 3 am and wake up at 7 am. We don’t even own a coffeemaker, so caffeine is not a part of this equation.

On a typical late night I’ll send some obvious (to me, at least) signals, meant to convey: “if there’s going to be any intimacy tonight, it better be soon, because I am tired and I’m ready for bed!” For instance, I’ll shut the computer down (signal #1) while Curtis invariably is typing away at his. I’ll lean over to kiss him (signal #2) and ask him something to the effect of, “Are you planning on staying up late?” (signal #3). Being the demure, modest, and somewhat shy lady that I am, my hope is that Curtis gets the message and gets ready for bed too! I have to admit though, my subtle approach can be too subtle at times and I don’t always achieve my goal.

My dear husband has his own set of signals, which he implemented the other night rather successfully. It was a regular evening, almost midnight, when I did my signal routine, with apparently not much of a response from Curtis. So, I walked to the bedroom to get ready for bed. As I opened the door to our bedroom, the lights were off and two fragrant candles were lit on opposite sides of the room. Wow, I was so impressed! I couldn’t help chuckling to myself at Curtis’ sneakiness and forethought.

I shut the door, and got ready for bed. Then, I snuggled WAAAY under the covers and pretended to be asleep. A few minutes later, I heard Curtis’ footsteps outside the door. Waiting for the perfect moment, I felt him walk past the bed in the candlelight. All of the sudden, I whipped off the covers and yelled, “THE BRITISH ARE COMING! THE BRITISH ARE COMING!!” and collapsed into a fit of giggles.

Who says signals can’t be fun?


Jersey girl by birth, sailor by marriage, wife & mother by grace.

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